Description

Condition: New

Once more into the breach Gertrude......

A Chara

We bring to the market a job lot, 39-40 if I've counted correctly, of surgical, or isolation, gowns.

€5. Each. Not the whole lot; I'm not Dominos doing 2 for Tuesdays.

But these aren't just any old surgical or isolation gowns....

No, these are blue single use, disposable ones.....

Size Large with a 170 Cm. drop; in old money that's about 5 Foot 8 Inches, maybe 5,9 I guess?

From China; the gowns are, not me.

Comes with instructions & diagrams of how to don* 'em; they're affixed** at the neck & at the waist; behind in both cases so you'd either want to have a partner when you're gowning & gloving up*** or be fair flexible in being able reach round top & bottom for both at the beginning & end of surgery.

*Posh word for "wear"

**Another posh word; what you do today lad, eat a Thesaurus for breakfast was it?
(No, a Thesaurus is NOT a dinosaur......)

***Medical terms; I saw 'em on Scrubs....

If you play your cards right & throw on a similarly coloured shower cap, you could be in theatre in Lukes operating on someone within days of purchasing these.

Bizarrely, perhaps somewhat concerningly too the labelling says they're not suitable for use in an ICU; kind of defeats the purpose a bit I think? Plus unfit for use in red areas in medical institutions as per the wrapping.

But let's gloss over that little detail and crack on will we?

As a USP you could dress up & play pretend Drs. & Nurses and sure if you do it right, like in them types of movies you could end up being Mammies & Daddies too & sure you'd be the best boy in the delivery suite with one of these already on you for the whole birth thing......

Suitable for a Halloween costume next year too......

No try before you buy; I'm not "Penneys Hun" and won't be letting you use my jacks as a changing room.

No I won't be modelling them; the world's not ready for it yet.

Readies upfront; PayPal preferred as we may not like the colour of your greenbacks & no cash discounts.

This isn't a 2 for 1 or BOGOF offer either; they might be "Crazy Prices" but I'm not Maurice Pratt of Quinnsworth fame.

No Revolut; I don't do smartphones; they're the Devils work I tells ya; that and I'm not one of the "Look at me I'm a social media guru/influencer/Insta Hun/Bebo Stunnah" syncophantic**** odious t***s.

****Behaving or done in an obsequious way in order to gain advantage.

No refunds; you buy, you take, I give, you get & that's it; let's not overthink this one please?

*****Ideally I'd like to get shot of these in one go but certainly not one by one.

I'm not in any hurry to sell 'em so won't be strong armed on price.

If the price isn't to your liking let's talk but no extracting the urine; it's no skin off of my teeth if they don't sell.*****

These products are legitimately sourced and, while not quite "Farm 2 Fork" traceability, they're not edibles so not subject to such scrutiny.

But suffice to say they didn't, did NOT, fall off the back of a lorry....

All the usual Stokes, Kennedy Crowley KMPG Ts & Cs apply; no Mickey Money Tuesday or "I'll pay ya if my 13th Sprog Britney-Shadyn-Odhrán by Antos mainto cheque doesn't bounce" types need apply.

Collection only in "Carlow Lad".

Ends.